EXCERPTS from CHapter 3

That evening I went home happy, but impatient. I just wanted all the paperwork done, to pack and get out of there. I was in a hurry. It was going to be really hard to endure the process of getting this letter.

I knew I needed to find a way to get the money, but I had no idea how. Where or who would it come from? It was a few hundred dollars, which was a decent amount back then, especially for me. I was thinking and thinking, to find some way to make this happen. Nothing was coming to mind, but I was sure I’d find a way.

Is this true? What’s happening to me? What’s happening is I want more. I want a progressive life and growth. I want independence, to be free and strong. None of which is possible here. There aren’t enough opportunities.   So  many people are unemployed. Thank God people help each other survive, and I give them credit. But those people don’t need or want more. They’re happy as long as they have bread on the table every day and hang out. But that’s not me. I don’t want to just survive.

We can’t be independent here because our families won’t let us move out and do whatever we want. We can’t be strong because they won’t let us. I want to be free. And by free, I mean free inside, in my soul. No judgment, no criticism, no everyday worries about who said what to whom and how often. No mandatory cultural things like getting married before I’m twenty or being home before 11:00 at night.